The bigger picture...

Sometimes we make plans, even plans with God. But in our minds, the results don't look anything like what we expected.

That's how I feel ministry school was for me. I knew I was obeying God. And I still believe I was. I was expecting God to provide, somehow, for me to complete it.

Well, for some reason, he didn't. Even the economic problems aren't big enough to stop him, despite what the media may tell you. He's been coming through for a lot of people in school. For some reason, I just wasn't one of them.

For a short time, I was offended. I didn't understand why God did not let me complete the school. I was trying to figure it all out.

I had a talk via e-mail with Padre Matt from New Beginnings Church back at home. They're the ones that sent me out here. He has released me to leave Redding to find work in any other cities. The unemployment rate is bad everywhere, but it's especially ridiculous here in Redding right now. It was 11.1% last time I checked. Matt said he had seen a lot of growth in me and felt I was at a point where I can move on.

Anyway, back to ministry school. The expected result was to get that certificate and have some credentials to actually be recognized to be in ministry. Well, that's not what happened. But what has happened, I believe is the real reason to go, and that was for God to change me. That, he did. It took me a couple of months to figure that out, but he has changed me. He's been working on me, through the school and through having to drop out, to make me into the person he wants me to be.

It's still on my heart to go back to BSSM, but also if God has other plans, I want to be obedient to him. I may have to leave Redding to find another job, and I'm ok with that now, especially since the ones that were backing me are still behind me if I make the decision to leave. They're not in a position to financially support me at this time, but they're still praying for me.

I stepped out in faith, and though the results weren't as I expected, it wasn't a failure at all. The results I did get were far more important than getting that certificate. And to often when things don't work out, we try to figure it out when we can't. I don't need to have it all figured out. I just need to trust in Him!